"I'm trying to get a hold on this"

It's a well established fact that generally fun people hate New Year's Eve. The idea of forced fun makes the spontaneous shudder. The idea of paying three times more for a night out makes us feel despair. Not to mention the oldies and the children that suddenly appear all over town and the fact that getting a taxi is impossible.

M has decided on the classic 'if you can't beat em join em' route and is going to an oldie BBQ which is likely to have her in bed not long after midnight. NYE is no longer the evening for crazy antics. If it ever was.

J is off camping at a music festival with Druggie, her new boyfriend and a few other buddies. She got a whole bunch of alcohol stolen off her on the first night and someone (most likely Druggie to be honest) pissed in her baby pool. It's already all falling apart. At least she can get high and stare into space and feel like she's having a good time.

L and G are spending the night with respective new (old whatever) boyfriends which is giving A the shits. She's decided to organise a poker night with her remaining uni friends and mull over how much they don't want to graduate at the end of the coming year.

NYE generally means someone will get emotional and have a break-down, the booze will run an out an hour too early and at least 5 people you don't know will send you a text message wishing you a happy new year and saying they love you.

"Roll on"

Non-stop moshing to The Living End on their retrospective tour.

Dodging couples because we hate PDA and co-dependency. Yeah L, that now includes you.

Midnight shopping for Christmas presents.

Being hungover as fuck from the work Christmas party...three days later.

Risky hook-ups with guys met on the street late at night. Not even just J. A and M have done it too.

Candles and sangria at the night market.

Summer. December. Holidays. Yes.

"Something ain't quite right, you got the devil on your side, standing to your right come on"

G has decided to still go on her South America trip despite her no-longer-ex-boyfriend not wanting her to. She invited him along, but he doesn't have the money. He is disappointed she is still going but says he understands. They are still back together. She is leaving in 2 weeks. A admitted she may have (may have?) overreacted about them getting back together, but their friendship is rocky at best. G is going to be away for almost 3 months, so A's little brother is going to be her housemate for the rest of the summer. G isn't sure whether she'll want to move back in after her and A's big fight. She is thinking about perhaps moving into a place with her boyfriend.

'the one' and his girlfriend officially broke up on facebook and he told J it was all over. J had a mild freakout that it was all her fault since they have been having issues over him hanging out with her and dancing with her at club. J, of course, wants nothing from him but his friendship, but 'the one' is still into her so you can see why his girlfriend (okay ex) is freaking out a bit. But really, if you can't trust your guy you shouldn't be together. He will always be tempted by someone. And that is apparently the conclusion she has come to. 'the one' seemed unusually down about the break-up so J took him out with a couple of his mates. Unfortunately 'the one' became emotionally drunk and crying and had to be taken home. His arsehole friend that J had sex with one time started acting like a prat and making comments about J's bra size. It was really not an enjoyable night for anyone.

L has apparently been hooking up with one of her and A's uni friends for the last month. A is pissed that L never mentioned it to her. L finally confessed to her after one of their mutual friends caught them together and asked A if she knew what was up. L doesn't want to label it and the word 'boyfriend' is freaking her out so she wants to keep it on the down low. Pity A can't keep a secret. Unless it's her secret. L is content with friends with benefits but relationships still scare her. Good to see the commitment phobia alive and well.

Meanwhile M is trying to figure out what to buy her father's married girlfriend for Christmas and Druggie is searching for a new therapist. You can't go wrong with scented hand cream...right?

"I don't like it when you assfuck my best friend in the heart"

G and her ex-boyfriend are back together. Officially. Despite the fact that they were broken up for over a month some of their mutual friends never even found out. "Things are back to normal" G declared, brushing her breakdown under the rug and pretending she didn't spend a week crying and unable to get out of bed. A is livid. He broke her heart. And now she plans on pretending nothing happened? She's not even making him work for it. No boomboxes outside her window, no back-together dinner, just nothing.

He even wants her to cancel her South America trip. A became furious at the idea and her and G got in a huge fight. A told G she was a moron for getting back together with a guy who showed no empathy and broke her heart and their relationship was going through a bad phase anyway. G told A she was a bitch who knew nothing about what it took to sustain an actual relationship because all she has is a series of dodgy one-night-stands. A responded by having a loud, energetic marathon sex session with V to prove not all her sex is dodgy. Of course, V has just returned from a trip to Thailand with a few mates and another girl he's sleeping with.

J is freaking out because it appears 'the one' and his girlfriend are having jealously issues and public fights/breakdowns on facebook. She doesn't want to be egocentric, but his girlfriend saw them chatting last week and has always hated J because 'the one' is obsessed with her. It's not J's fault. Yeah, she slept with him once. But it was a freaky one-night-stand in a park. She's never lead him on since then and just wants to be mates. Why does this keep happening to her?

L caught up with H (but no B and K because they are giving her the shits and keep harassing her to hang out and then saying they are never free). Apparently H and accidental date and her have started a band and are about to try to crack the music business. In India. While H has always been into music and played in a variety of garage rock bands (and she used to know most of the people in the local music scene until she dropped off the social circuit completely) being an Indian pop star had never exactly been her dream. And she would never spend 3 months living with a boyfriend's family. But at least it's exciting. That, if nothing else, shows that some things never change. Even if everything else does.

"I never wanna act my age"

What? Who told you that wine made an inappropriate breakfast or that it's not 'adult' to have cereal for dinner? Pfft. Actually maybe it's not 'adult' but who wants to act their age anyway?

It's summer. Which means working ridiculous hours in retail and/or hospitality dealing with irritating customers. Really, you can't use an EFTPOS machine? Were you born in the 1800s? And who exactly thought it would be a good idea to have the drunken riot Christmas party at Taco Bill? Luckily, it also means spending time in pubs and arguing with barstaff about cricket (yes Ricky Ponting is a legend) and whether or not a martini should be shaken not stirred (yes Skyfall is the best Daniel Craig Bond yet, and thank god because we all want to forget Quantum of Solace). Isn't daylight savings and sun well past 8pm great?

Beer and the beach just go together so ridiculously well.

"We are never ever getting back together"

There's nothing attractive about responsibility.

A is playing boring and basically living in the uni library so J is hanging out with her rock and roll friends. 'the one' is still with his girlfriend but always stares at J in a creepy way. She gets along well with most of his mates, except for one she has had sex with and who is a sexist asshole. She also has a bunch of new hippie friends she's also been hanging out with and going on day trips with. She bumped into best-sex-she's-ever-had over the weekend and said hi but his child bride girlfriend was with him as well as another friend of his J went on a date with once and happens to hate because he's boring and irritating. Her life is getting a little incestuous. Oh well.

Druggie had to move out after breaking up with her boyfriend and ended up back in the 'burbs with her parents. They stole her weed supply so she's basically moved in with her old friend she was sharing romantic texts with before the break-up. He also lives with her parents but she's decided that doesn't matter and they have very loud sex.

M and E are backing to being good friends after her ultimatum. He admitted he still has feelings for her but that he thinks he needs to have some time being single. This makes sense considering his 1,2,3 relationships with psycho ex, M and the NZ girl. M made it clear she is not waiting around for him and that she will move on but she understands where he is coming from. They are determined to stay friends and things are flowing better than they have for months. They finally seem to have made some concrete decisions. M is being strong. She will not be the girl who waits for the guy. She is enjoying her life and having an awesome friendship with E. She doesn't think they will get back together anymore and the idea is freeing for her. She can finally let go of the past and retain a great friendship. Which is how it should be.

G has managed to finally pick up the pieces. She got a tattoo and booked herself a trip to South America and is feeling good about life. She decided she and her ex-boyfriend simply weren't meant to be and it was time to stop moping. Excellent news. She also confessed to A she'd had sex with him twice since breaking up but that it didn't mean anything and it was definitely not going to happen again. A was pissed but figured if G actually told her about it then it meant it wasn't going to happen again. G had a big conversation with her ex that she was finally ready to move on but she wanted to stay friends because they had so much history together. He responded by telling her he wants to get back together.

What the fuck?! G has been a mess for over a month and he waits until she finally gets her shit together before deciding he made a mistake and telling her he wants to get back together with her. Selfish. He wants to have his cake and eat it too. He was obviously jealous of her chatting to one of their single mutual friends at trivia- they weren't even flirting. He doesn't want G to have anyone else, but he isn't exactly making a strong case for wanting her back either. He is just being weak. And stupid.

A has made her feelings clear on the matter- 'How can you ever even consider getting back with someone who hurt you like that?' but G pointed out that A knows shit about relationships and sometimes it's about forgiveness.

But she still hasn't made a decision.

"Hurricane knew you would"

Oh P, how we have missed you and your gossip about the gay life. But Christmas is approaching, which means Christmas parties and randomly bumping into people you haven't seen in ages and inviting them out for a drink which always seems to involve getting ridiculously drunk and somehow losing your shirt. Or is that just us?

P entertained A and J with stories of how he has been on literally hundreds of dates this year with everyone from tradies to lawyers to freaks who think it's appropriate to bring their ecstasy addicted friends on dates because "I promised I'd buy her dinner". Not to mention the awkward conversation he had with his ex when telling him all his dating stories and then asking how he'd been. His ex had been on exactly one date since they broke up, over a year ago. All P had to say to that was "Um...Grindr?" But then, P has always been very popular in the gay scene.

Then there was the very public breakdown one of his mates had at a gay club after P made out with the guy (and possibly jerked him off on a the couch) he apparently liked, which resulted in P telling him that he was after everyone and hey if he got to call everyone no one else would ever get laid. His mate called him a drama queen and started posting nasty things on twitter. P got laid. And got to see everything in his mirror, which runs the entire length of his wall.

P also apparently has a new fuck buddy with a fast tongue who only ever texts him 2 things: "Come blow me" and "I'll be right over". J's response? "That is my dream man." P told her he was also seeing this bi guy who wanted to have a threesome and asked if she was interested. A was pissed off that he hadn't asked if she was interested but P plainly pointed out he knows A hates to share and wouldn't be interested. J said she'd think about it.

At least on this occasion, P didn't give any lectures on how a choc top isn't just something you get at the movies.

What we're doing this month....

Loving: drinking cider and lazing in the sun
Listening to: Black Rabbits by Grinspoon
Crushing on: Joseph Gordon-Levitt
Worshipping: hot weather
Eating: potato salad
Drinking: old fashioneds...too much Mad Men perhaps?
Rocking: loose singlets over bikini tops
Reading: The Trial by Franz Kafka
Failing: summer school