A day in the life of...

The young have something no one else has or ever will have. Time.

It's true. We are smart, beautiful and...alcoholic.

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

"Liar Liar"

What we love: cute bartenders who make us up cocktails on the spot with whatever ingrediants we choose (this week gin, passionfruit and lemon juice, yum!).
What we hate: liars and the lying liars that tell them.

Like that's news.

A couple of days ago J, A M and another one of M's friends who they've been hanging out with since M's birthday where they all hit it off decided to go out for dinner. All fine and good right? Well that is until it turned out L, K and H were all also having dinner at the same place. Rather odd that B wasn't there. You don't so often see K without her sidekick these days. Perhaps she was sick. Perhaps K is a sicko and B is sick of it.

Just in case you don't read this blog on a regular basis (so, all of you) H disappeared from the face of the earth about 6 months ago when she started dating one of her co-workers accidental date. She stopped answering her phone, deleted her facebook, moved house and quit her job. L and K have sworn they hadn't seen her since. A, J and M certainly haven't seen her although H and M weren't all that close. L has been MIA a bit ever since H pulled her disappearing act as well, being practically uncontactable for the majority of the summer even though she had no job, no study and no boyfriend. K started a big fight with A and J a few weeks ago and now they aren't talking. She hasn't seen M in awhile but bailed on her birthday for 'family' and 'financial reasons' even though she went out with other friends the night before.

Clearly, someone's been lying.

A and J were too stunned to talk so they quickly exited the place and had Vietnamese instead. The dinner was mostly spent discussing what on earth was going on. Had L and K (and thus B) been seeing H behind A and J's back? They'd both point-blank said they hadn't seen her in the last six months. What was going on? Poor M's friend. She really had no idea what they were talking about.

J and M decided it should be left to A to confront either L or K about it, because she's the best at confrontations. It's funny because back in the day, it would have been H who was voted to take on the twins if need be. Funny how things change. A had to go to a party for one of her and L's mutual (uni) friends anyway so after a few glasses of champagne decided it would be a good time to launch an attack.

She demanded to know why L has been ignoring her and J over the past summer and since then, what exactly she is doing on the twins' side of the fight (because no one is ever on the twins side in a fight...except for the twins themselves and possibly T and R back in the day) and just how often she's been seeing H- and why she neglected to tell her that she had in fact seen her. Turns out L has been seeing H a fair bit for the last few months now, and there was several dinners between L, H and the twins. 'Several' meaning not that many but enough that K or B were not telling the truth when they said they hadn't seen H or in fact L. L's reasons for why she's been ignoring A and J include: they are out of control (with drink, drugs and sex); she doesn't want to have to sacrifice her friendship with H and she feels it's uncomfortable being friends with all of them since J and A are angry with H; she feels they don't like her boyfriend secret admirer; she thinks they are pissed off at her.

A's response? How would L even know whether they were 'out of control'? She hasn't been hanging out with them! A doesn't do drugs and doesn't even have sex lately. J is in a committed relationship (although monogamy is questionable but she hasn't slept with anyone else yet) and has cut back on her smoking. Apparently K has been spreading rumours about J and A (but particularly J)'s behaviour- most of what she's saying has been false. And this isn't even since the recent fight but beforehand when everything seemed to be okay. B must have been in on it as well. A then there's the whole thing with H. While J and A were pissed off at first (as was L!) they are long since over that and have been trying (but failing) to contact her for ages. They've never been anything but polite to secret admirer (as opposed to H) and have never been really pissed off. At least not that a returned phone call wouldn't fix.

Is it all K? Has she been poisoning the well so to speak? Is she really that fucked up? Well K is kind of a lunatice and it's believable enough that she'd try to play both sides even if there's no apparent motive.

But who would believe her? Anyone she could reasonably influence knows she's a lunatic. A and J haven't been buying her stories. The only reason L would is if that's what she thought in the first place. Or maybe it has nothing to do with K. Maybe it's just a bunch of excuses and L's too gutless to tell the truth and blaming things on the psycho is an easy way out.

Either way, who judges your best friends like that?

Only someone who was never a best friend to begin with.

Monday, April 25, 2011

"Objection, your honour. You can't preface your second point with 'first of all'"

Do people seriously care about the royal wedding? I mean REALLY? None of the girls (or guys) we know could care less about who's designing the dress or whatever everyone is pretending to be interested in. The only thing vaguely interesting is the drinking game suggestions floating around facebook. And even still, no amount of drinking is going to make The Wedding fun. Yawn.

The Wedding may be more fun than the birthday party J and A attended the other night. It was a family friend of J's and she insisted A come along because otherwise she'd be bored. A couldn't understand why she didn't take Motley Crue instead. Yes, they're back together. 'Back' meaning they spent a week apart without talking (and without Motley answeringJ's calls) but now they're back on and having a good time again. J's not the type of girl who worries too much about something like her boyfriend going MIA for a week or two. Still, she decided it would be more fun with A. It would have been a total snoozefest without her.

Everyone else was standing around looking classy and drinking their expensive red wine while listenign to classical music. It was a family friend, right? Not a friend J had actually chosen. A nice girl but we tend not to associate that much with nice girls. A showed up, dressed in the shortest dress in the place, drunk, loud and obnoxious. She convinced the DJ to start blasting The Sex Pistols, spotted her mate G (apparently the friend is a friend of her boyfriend) and did several shots, ate seven cupcakes and made out with J's cousin during the speeches. J got herself a bottle rather than a glass or red, snuck out the back to smoke dope with another cousin and took to the dancefloor with some of the dirtiest moves since the latest Step Up movie. As the party fizzled out, A, J and G (and a few other hangers-on) headed out to a favourite club for dancing and beer. P was there so J joined him for smokes and gossip (bitching about the long-time-no-see S).

The followinf day A, J, P and M caught up for coffee and french toast to interogate A over whether she'd broken her no-sex vow with J's cousin. Turns out no. Lucky, or J may take it as an invitation to sleep with Dumbass.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

"She's got tattoos and piercings, she likes Minor Threat she likes Social Distortion"

It's true. It's official. Brazilian waxes are more painful than tattoos. Sucks to be a girl.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

"He likes vampires and hit list radio"

J and Motley Crue may be over as quickly as they began. Maybe that's what happens when you meet your boyfriend in a park. Friday night Motley was having a little birthday drinks celebration and J was a bit nervous because his parents and ex were going to be there but she figured what the hell. That's what girlfriends do right? Well, maybe. Then she got a call just as she was about to leave from Motley saying the birthday was off because he was tired from work. At that point J was more confused than pissed off. I mean who bails on their own birthday party? It's really quite bizzare.

She hasn't heard from him since this call. She called him the next day. No response. He was supposed to go to M's party. He didn't show up. She sent him a couple of text messages. No reply.

What the fuck?

We've all experienced the waiting-by-the-phone-for-that-wanker-guy-who-said-he'd-call-and-never-actually-did feeling. Well, perhaps not waiting by the phone (at least not in the last 5 years) but you know, the disappointment when you never get that text. K has perhaps felt it more than the rest of us, but that could be because she's overly eager to hand her phone number out to just anyone. We've also probably been responsibile for the same feeling being felt by several guys who we've never called or texted back. Well, A certainly has been.

But this is different. J and Motley have been spending their weekends together (every weekend which is a huge deal for J) for the past two months. They've been speaking at least every second day, sometimes every day. They've been getting along and having fun and having great sex. There was no fight or even a suggestion that anything was wrong. Motlet Crue was even making comments about the future, telling her her dad will get to like him in due time. Now this. Now he's disappeared.

J is not the possessive type. K would call his home phone, or show up on his doorstep (despite the over-an-hour train trip), or his workplace and harrass him about answering her calls. That is not who J is. Sure she likes the chase, when it's making eyes at a guy across the dancefloor and convincing him to buy her a drink, but she doesn't like chasing guys around Melbourne under any circumstances.

So is this it?

Motley Crue did not seem like this kind of guy. He seemed fun. He played guitar, smoked pot, liked drinking and good music. Plus, he seemed reliable and always showed up when he said he would. So why has he disappeared? Did he just get bored? He could have just told J, she wouldn't really have cared. Yeah J has liked him more than any other guy and hasn't even kissed anyone else since they hooked up but she's not that overdramatic. It's only been 2 months. All she wants is an explanation. She just doesn't like feeling this confused or frustrated.

Is it just a typical guy thing to break up by ignoring? We may never find out. The sad thing is, thanks to the experiences of the past year (ahem H...ahem L) we're kind of used to people disppearing into the blue.

You just can't really trust anyone.

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

"I'm sorry I called you a gap-toothed bitch. It's not your fault you're so gap-toothed."

The drama just never stops with K does it? M has been organising a huge party for her 25th birthday for months and has been really excited about it. She's changed the date several times to make sure it suited everyone. Now, with only a week to go K has announced she and B won't be able to attend because it 'costs too much money'. M is basically organising and paying for the entire thing, drinks included. K's excuse is she can't afford the taxi fee. Between her and B it would be about five dollars each. B naturally hasn't mentioned a word about it.

A, being A, decided to confront K about it. She was particularly annoyed because K has been messaging her a lot lately asking why they never hang out and making A feel guilty for being super busy with work and all her uni extracurriculars. It had also come shortly after K had bailed on dinner with A and M. A essentially accused K of being a hipocrite by always complaining that no one makes time for her when it was really her that wasn't putting in any effort. K became aggressive and defensive and started saying A was a shit friend and so was J. She said J had told her she hated her family and really upset her. J was quit surprised to hear about this as she hasn't seen K in weeks and is sure she never said such a thing as it isn't true. She then said A should be more sensitive because she is having family problems and both her parents are sick. Is it cruel not to feel sympathetic? After finding out she'd lied about her dad having an operation to get money out of J, it's hard to take her seriously. And while you feel bad when your friend is having problems, K has a tendency to throw her problems in your face in an accusatory way as if they are a weapon. A refused to let K's comments make her feel bad when she thought she was perfectly entitled to bring it up. K ended it by stalking off and telling A to have a nice life. A then left her a voicemail telling K that the fact that she ends every fight by cutting the person off (ie deleting them off facebook) and is always over-dramatising everything and is the whole problem.

An hour later J was surprised to receive a text from K saying 'have a nice life. im telling your parents about your boyfriend and new tattoo'. J didn't quite understand the threat as her parents know about both her boyfriend and the latest addition to her bodyart. The abusive messages kept coming however. J finally ended it by calling K a manipulative psycho to fuck the hell off. She later flound out about A and K's fight but couldn't understand why K had dragged her into it.

Well, guess the twins won't be coming to M's party.

Friday, April 1, 2011

What we're doing this month...

Loving: Make It or Break It...makes us want to learn gymnastics
Listening to: Unwritten Law
Crushing on: Tom Felton without the Draco Malfoy hair
Worshipping: Rebecca Black, she's totally taking the piss out of us...right?
Eating: omelettes with mushrooms and spring onion
Drinking: 42 Below Kiwi flavoured vodka
Rocking: superthick superlong cardigans
Reading: For the Term of His Natural Life
Failing: to get our homework done